Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)
Can a guy in prison really love you?
Of course, a guy in prison can still love you. You need to understand that imprisonment and maintaining a relationship are not mutually exclusive. The taboo associated with people living in prison needs to curb down.
Obviously, it doesn’t mean that he should be completely forgiven for what he has done, but taking away his basic human emotion to fall in love and maintain a lovely relationship shouldn’t be taken away from him.
That being said, we need to address the elephant in the room by saying that these relationships can be extremely difficult to maintain. This is not only due to the physical proximity but also the heavy restrictions that a person in prison lives under.
There are countless examples of people serving their prison terms and maintaining their relationship with their spouses and partners back home. It can be challenging but certainly not impossible.
How do you know if an inmate loves you?
With a certain sense of maturity, you develop instincts to figure out the feelings of someone towards you. Of course, in the context of a prison, things get complicated to a different degree due to the extenuating circumstances involved. But nonetheless, it is not rocket science and can be asserted with careful assertion.
The first order of rules here is to be patient and give value to time. You should neither give in to the feelings of a person who is serving prison time nor should you disregard it right away. Neither end of the spectrum is healthy.
Try to listen and understand what it is about you that makes him or her love you. Is it just the loneliness of the prison or is he or she genuinely interested in the person that you are? Make sure to have in-depth conversations regarding what inspires his or her feelings for you.
In addition to that, you need to find the feasibility of the relationship, in case you are interested in him or her as well. This includes trying to map a plan for your future when he or she completes his or her prison time.
At the end of the day, you need to remember that when people are serving prison time, they are at one of their most vulnerable stages. So, feelings for someone can naturally draw in. This is nothing out of ordinary.
How to make an inmate fall in love with you?
First and foremost, it should be known that love is not a business deal. You can’t force or apply analytical or strategical chops to make someone else fall in love with you. It has to be generated naturally.
This is why the fact that two people who love each other is so special because as common as it may sound, but it’s a rarity to find someone who loves you back in the same vein of thought as you love them.
Now, when it comes to inmates in a prison, there is an added complex layer of solitude. When people are left in a vulnerable situation like that of a prison, where they are surrounded by strangers who mostly exhibit hostile behavior, things can get extremely discouraging and gloomy.
If you genuinely develop feelings for someone who is serving prison time, you need to practice patience and remember that the road to achieving love will be difficult than with someone free on the outside world.
You need to spend time with the person and be a place of solace for them. Most inmates often develop pessimistic attitudes and hope is a rare commodity in prison. So, try and be the light of hope for them. That being said, don’t make false promises to them and be a fictitious ray of hope because that will not end well for either of you.
It doesn’t mean that you need to counsel him or her, but just being a good listener is enough. If he or she is shy, then you need to let the train of conversation going. However, you also need to get comfortable with the idea of silence around him or her.
If someone can be comfortably silent around you and not have to constantly verbally talk to you to let you know of his or her feelings, it means he or she feels secure with you. So that is a good sign.
Engage in positive conversations and try to align your common likes and dislikes and nurture your relationship. If he or she feels valued by you, it is very likely that he or she would develop feelings for you. But, if not, don’t be discouraged. You can’t force love.
It has to happen naturally and if he or she regards you as a valuable friend, then you need to assess whether you want to continue that or it will be extremely difficult to be around him or her by being just a friend. Put your own mental health at priority.
How do you make a prisoner feel loved?
Spending quality time is the key to making someone feel loved. However, in the restrained environment of a prison, choices are extremely limited. But as they say, “where there is a will, there is a way.” You need to make the most out of the situation available to you.
Supposedly, your partner is serving prison time, then you need to ensure that you make the visits count as much as possible. Try and make sure you never miss your visit. This is because, for your partner, this might be the only time they could contact with the outside world on a weekly, fortnightly, or monthly basis. So, don’t miss them.
During the visits, try to listen to them and their experiences. Based on what he or she likes, give them a glimpse of the outside world through your words. Some people might get upset with too much talk of the outside since it makes them miss the outside world even more.
There are others who prefer to talk more of the outside world. Find your niche and flow the conversation to that degree. If possible, try to visit them on their birthdays or other anniversaries by making a special permit.
And most importantly, make sure to remind them that they are valued and you are waiting for them in the outside world.
Can you kiss during prison visits?
This varies heavily from country to country, state to state, and prison to prison. But for the most part, you would be allowed to give a brief hug and kiss not lasting more than two seconds at the start of your visit and also at the end of the visit.
This is mainly due to the fact that authorities fear passing of contraband or other similar items during close physical contact. It is unfortunate but it is the way it is. So, make sure that those two embracing moments in the beginning and the end of the session is worth it.
What do I write to prisoners?
Simply put, write your heart out each time you decide to write a letter to them. Don’t be afraid to make the letter long and detailed because, unlike the outside world, prisoners have a lot of free time to themselves where they have nothing else to do.
Add to the fact that they miss the outside world, they would appreciate a long, detailed letter very much. That being said, if long letters are not your style, don’t fill it up with gibberish just for the sake of it. Be genuine and heartfelt with your approach.
While writing about important health updates of the prisoner’s loved ones is essential alongside other educational or career achievements of their loved ones, make sure to let loose by not being afraid to be silly. Even a description of how you drenched yourself from the rain while commuting can bring joy to the person serving a prison term.
Therefore, be yourself and make sure you mean each and every word that you write to your loved one who is serving at the prison because those words can be their sneak peek to the outside world and can bring joy, happiness, and peace to them.
Do prisoners have access to the Internet?
This has been a subject of controversy across the world for a while now. For obvious reasons, contact with the outside world is prohibited inside a prison. But many human rights activists are fighting for the right of the prisoners to freedom to the internet under supervision.
Few correctional systems in North America allow prisoners to use the internet under supervision, which seems pretty fair. Now, whether this can be used for having access to online dating websites or not depends on the discretion of the respective prison.